Understanding the distinction between our Inner and Outer Lives is crucial to living a balanced and fulfilled existence. The Inner Life refers to our private world—our thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations. It is the constant hum of our internal dialogue, shaped by personal experiences, histories, and physical realities. Whether it’s a headache, worries about family, or the lingering effects of an argument, our inner life profoundly affects how we perceive and react to the world around us.
In contrast, the Outer Life is everything we express and do that others can observe. It’s the behaviors, actions, and non-verbal communication we engage in daily, like eye contact, gestures, and spoken words. While the outer life is visible, it only reflects a fraction of the vast internal world we carry within.
These two dimensions of life are constantly interacting. For instance, during a business meeting, you might be actively engaged in a conversation about strategy, yet a part of your mind could be distracted by discomfort in your stomach from a poorly digested lunch. This illustrates how our Inner Life (feelings and physical sensations) intersects with our Outer Life (our observable actions in the meeting). Another example is waking up upset from a stressful event at work, which can spill over into interactions with loved ones, making you irritable or short-tempered.
The thoughts we focus on and how we feel internally significantly affect every aspect of our lives. Yet, most of us spend more time investing in our outer lives—pursuing education, building careers, and accumulating material success—while neglecting the cultivation of our inner life. When we ignore the inner landscape, we may find ourselves feeling empty, dissatisfied, or overwhelmed despite outward achievements.
To find true fulfillment, we need to shift focus inward. By developing a rich inner life, we can respond to external pressures with resilience and clarity. Instead of chasing happiness in external outcomes, we can anchor our well-being in a sense of inner peace and contentment. Inner life leadership means cultivating thoughts, emotions, and feelings that support your best self, no matter the external circumstances.
A Daily Morning Practice: One Change That Can Change Everything
If you’re looking for a single, transformative practice to begin nurturing your Inner Life, a simple yet powerful daily exercise can be the key: A Daily Morning Practice. By setting aside just five minutes each morning, you can lay the foundation for a life that feels more centered, peaceful, and aligned with your true intentions.
Here’s how it works:
This practice may seem simple, but it is incredibly impactful. Dedicating just five minutes a day to this process can help you cultivate the thoughts and feelings that will guide you toward the life you truly desire.
I invite you to commit to this practice for at least one month. At the end of the month, take time to reflect on the impact it has had. Have you felt more in control of your responses to life’s challenges? Has it helped you feel more connected to yourself and others? Small changes like this can ripple outward, affecting every aspect of your life. This one change can truly change everything.
Our world has changed, rapidly and in unexpected ways. As the crisis hit, I offered and held pro bono sessions with leaders from around the world. And I want to continue to do what I can to help. As a result, I now offer hourly sessions to ensure leaders everywhere can quickly get the perspective, clarity and focus they need to lead themselves, and therefore others, well during these challenging and uncertain times.